i'm not human
by purple pansy
Summary: One-shot. Rejection plays a large part in the breaking of the heart. JessicaKanon.


**disclaimer: i do not own.  
note: for those who read freak out i will probably never update it, because i have lost interest in the story.**

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**i'm not human  
**_liquidstate ;D_

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"_I love you."_

"_Furniture are not allowed to love, especially their masters."_

"_...but, I love you."_

"_..."_

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Rejection plays a large part in the breaking of the heart. And knowing that Kanon will not return her love—will _never_ return her love, she thinks—breaks her heart all together. Knowing that creates the final crack. It hurts. When you heart is broken beyond repair, how can you function properly anymore?

Jessica sat in her room for the majority of the day. Her blue eyes are dull and her light is gone. She had become weak and frail over the past few weeks; her skin colour looked almost lifeless.

When her mother entered the room as her daily routine, she did not cry and weep for her daughter. She scowled at her and told her how pathetic she is for falling in love with a mere _servant_. Jessica was unresponsive to her mother and that angered her. She threw a tantrum and slapped and kicked Jessica to let out her frustration. Jessica knew that her mother had always had stressful problems and Aunt Eva was always making them worse. She did not fight back, because she believed that without Kanon she was nothing but a punching bag for her mother's frustration.

"You bring shame to the Ushiromiya Clan!" her mother shouted.

Unconsciously, Jessica retorted for the first time in weeks, "Says the one who has not gained clan approval from grandfather."

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Jessica didn't realize it until after her mother left, while she's lied on her bed trying to regain the air she had lost, that she had made a big mistake. She painfully moved her hand up to her neck and flinches when she touched the hand shaped bruise.

She wondered how Maria, her little cousin, must feel when Aunt Rosa abused her. It seemed that the evil witch within Aunt Rosa had been passed on to her mother.

In a situation where she needed him the most, she whispered, "Kanon-kun."

Soon after, the door opened and Jessica was too weak to pull the blanket over herself to cover the bruises. Shannon, a servant, entered with food that Jessica would probably not eat and walked over to the bed.

"Milady," she whispered, "What happened?"

No response.

Shannon carefully tended to Jessica's injuries and silently wept for her. She knew the situation Jessica was going through, but she could never understand her heart break. Not when she had George, Jessica's cousin. Kanon could not seem to get passed the fact that he was just "furniture" for the Ushiromiya clan and Jessica still does not understand Kanon's definition of furniture.

Shannon had never gone through depression, but she figured that Jessica symbolizes it very well. She wondered what Kanon would think if he saw Jessica in this state?

As if mind reading her thoughts, Kanon quietly knocked on the door to Jessica's room for the first time in weeks.

"U-Um, just a minute, please!" she shouted as she stumbled around and covers Jessica blankets. She also turned her around to face the wall so whoever entered the room would not see her sick looking features.

When she answered the door, she opened it slightly and tensed when she found out that it was Kanon standing in front of her; the cause of Jessica's problems.

"Kanon, how may I help you?" she spoke nervously.

Kanon waited a while before answering, "Why are you in Milady's room?"

"I was just bringing her some dinner."

"...I haven't seen Milady around the mansion. It's like she never leaves her room. May I come in?"

"U-Um, well, I don't really think that's a good idea because, well, she is sleeping and I was just about to leave. So let's not disturb her." Shannon stuttered.

Kanon narrowed his eyes, suspicious, "Shannon..." he warned.

And she caved, "Very well, just...be quiet okay? And don't go too close to the bed because she is a light sleeper and might wake up."

She opened the door to let him enter. Shannon watched him to make sure he saw nothing out of the ordinary. She found him intensely staring at Jessica's form lying on the bed and when she followed his stare towards Jessica she noticed how tense Jessica is.

And that's when she realized that Jessica was not asleep and knew that Kanon was in the room.

Shannon panicked, "Well, there she is. Perfectly fine and sound asleep. Now let's go so she can get some rest, alright?" she flailed as she tried to push Kanon out the door.

He grabbed Shannon's arm in a vice grip, "Is she shaking?"

Shannon managed to move Kanon out into the hallway, "Oh yeah, she's just probably cold. Don't worry, I'll put some more blankets on her and make her some tea. See you later, Kanon."

She all but slammed the door in his face and then rushed over to Jessica who was having a breakdown.

"It hurts, it hurts!" she cried. Despite her bruises, Jessica gripped the area where her heart is.

By observing Jessica, Shannon thinks that having a broken heart is the worse pain anyone will ever experience.

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The next day, when it is dinner time, Kanon is called into the dining room to clean up some spilled wine. While mopping the floor covered in wine, Kanon took notice of the empty chair beside one of the cousins. He searched through everyone who was seated at the table and realized that it was Jessica who was missing and wondered why she wasn't having her dinner.

He then remembered yesterday, when he visited Jessica's room and Shannon had told him that she had brought her dinner. He also remembered the panic in Shannon's eyes when he asked her if Jessica was shaking.

He concluded that something was wrong.

"Please excuse me for speaking at such an inappropriate time, but it appears that Milady is missing from the table." He spoke quietly.

He noticed that Jessica's mother became stiff and stopped eating.

"She's in her room. She hasn't come out of her room in weeks." Jessica's fathers said.

After cleaning up the mess, Kanon sat in his room, thinking about Jessica's behaviour. Her father said that she hadn't come out of her room in weeks, so something must have happened a few weeks ago to make Jessica become so isolated.

Like a light bulb turning on, he suddenly remembered a few weeks back, when Jessica confessed her feelings towards him. He remembered telling her that he could not accept her feelings by stating that he was only furniture. He then remembered the tears in her eyes and how she ran away quickly.

Oh.

OH.

This was his fault.

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He didn't bother knocking because he knew he wouldn't receive an answer anyway. When he entered the room he noticed that Jessica was in the exact same position as she was yesterday. It was like she had never moved.

"Who's there?" she said hoarsely, as if she lost her voice.

He didn't answer. Instead he moved closer to the bed and sat down at the end of it. And when she turned around to see him, she stared at him with wide eyes and then suddenly gripped her chest. Kanon was alerted and didn't know what to do.

He quickly moved and sat by her head, stroking her hair. This was usual for him but if it made Jessica feel a little better then he would do it.

It wasn't until she had calmed down that he noticed the bruises of her cheek and neck. He removed the blankets from her to find more visible bruises on her body. He suddenly became angry, wanting to hurt whoever did this to her.

"Jessica."

Jessica froze. It's the first time ever she has heard him say her name.

He called her Jessica.

He called her _Jessica_.

Not Milady, or Miss, but JESSICA.

She turned to look at him, her stained with tears, "Kanon-kun." She whispered.

Kanon touched a bruise on her arm gently, "Who did this to you?"

She wondered why he was worried about her. After his rejection she thought he didn't like her at all. His rejection showed her that she was nothing but a punching bag for her mother's frustration, just like he labelled himself as furniture. She still doesn't understand what he means by that.

"I'm not allowed to talk about it." She whispered.

"No." He spoke harshly, "No, you tell me who did this to you!"

She sighed, "I was just a punching bag for someone's troubles."

"Who's troubles?" He urged while sitting her up and gripping her shoulders, "Why didn't you fight back? Why did you just take it?"

"I'm just a punching bag for someone's troubles." She repeated, "That's all I ever will be."

"No, you're not! Don't think like that. You're a human being, not a punching bag. Who put this crap in your head? _Who did this to you?_ "

"Listen to us," she laughed bitterly, "It's like we've switched places."

Kanon raised his eyebrow at her, "What?"

She suddenly changed her mood and glared at him, "Don't you remember? I told you I loved you and you said that you were only furniture and that you could not love. Don't you remember me telling you that you were human?"

Kanon looked down at her hand gripping the bed sheets, "Milady I—"

"No! That's not my name."

Kanon stared at her for a long time, as if trying to think over and figure some things out. His hand moved to trace down her arm and he noticed that she shivered.

"Who did this to you?" he asked again.

"...My mother."

Kanon shut his eyes tight in disgust. To think that her own mother would beat her so savagely made him furious.

"Why?"

"She's always been upset over the fact that grandfather has not accepted her into the clan yet and Aunt Eva is fuelling her anger by teasing her about it."

He sighed and continued to stroke her hair affectionately, unconsciously, "I'll tend to your wounds. Where does it hurt the most?"

She didn't answer.

"Milady—I mean, Jessica?" he asked again.

"...My heart." She whispered.

"Your...heart hurts the most?"

She nodded, "It's broken."

Kanon was a little uncomfortable. He had never been in a situation like this, "I—I don't—!"

Jessica decided to be courageous and move forwards to kiss him. He sat frozen in place on the bed while Jessica's soft lips moved against his own. When she pulled away, her cheeks were dusted with a light pink.

"Milady—"

"_Jessica._"

"—Jessica, I'm sorry. But I'm only furniture."

Seconds later a stinging sensation reach his cheek. She had slapped him.

"Shut up. I don't fucking care what you _think_ you are, just kiss me."

It seemed like forever while he thought it over and Jessica's lips were starting to feel cold. He looked up at her, silently telling her that he was finished thinking. Now all she waited for was his response.

Surprising her, he leaned in closer while his hand reached her cheek and softly kissed her. Their lips moved in sync with each other and soon Kanon started to deepen the kiss as his hand move to the back of her neck.

Jessica moved her hands to his midnight black hair and pulled him down on her bed. It started as a simply kiss and then moved to a make out session. Kanon couldn't seem to control himself, but didn't really care as he found himself enjoying the kiss.

After a few more minutes they broke apart and just started at each other. Jessica's eyes started to become wet and a small smile spread across her face.

"Kanon-kun." She whispered.

"Hm?"

"I love you."

Kanon decided that Jessica's confession ruined the mood, because he was sure she was expecting him to say it back. He couldn't. He would admit that he has strong feelings for her but he was unsure about what to do with them because of his whole furniture theory.

"Jessica," he started, "I know that I'm only furniture, and furniture are not allowed to love, but..."

His eyes softened when he looked at her. She looked like she was about to break all together.

"But, maybe you could...teach me to become human. You could teach me how to love." He felt his blush rising to his cheeks so he leaned down into Jessica's neck and nuzzled the skin there, "Help me break free."

Jessica's tears paraded down her face and she beamed a smile at him, "Yes. Yes Kanon-kun."

In the end, they knew they were the answers to each other's problems. And they would help each other through them through any kinds of weather. Jessica loved him and she would give up her life for him, and Kanon would protect her with everything he has and eventually, learn to love her too. Her patience skills were incredible, he admired. He knew that he would never find anyone more special than Jessica.

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"_I love you."_

"_..."_

"_..."_

"_I...love you too." _

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**ohai, read meh.**

_naruto is still and always will be my number one manga.  
but i've come across this anime/manga.  
and i have fallen in love with jessica and kanon.  
there relationship is sexy.  
plusss, i really need to work on creating more stories.  
this month has been super busy anyway.  
...its like party month. woo!  
oh and i wrote this quickly and awkwardly so sorry if some phrases don't make sense._


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